Why Feelings Were Villains and Why They're the Hope For Anxiety
We have ditched feelings because of trending popularity methods that teach that feelings lie and become exaggerated and that we shouldn't be ruled by emotions. Certainly this can be true, once we get into our heads, feelings, which are meant to be indicators of discomfort for us, become exaggerated the more we think on them and the more negative vibration we put on them. We respond then, with an over-exaggerated dose of REACTION rather than ACTION...usually of the variety that we regret later.
See the problem isn't and never was the FEELING. Feelings are natural normal tools and mechanisms that indicate our humanity and drive us towards compassion towards ourselves and others. To shut them off because we fear how WE will respond is a grave error. The problem was never the FEELING. The problem was how we handled the feeling once it presented itself.
So I'd like, as a new group mentality, to change our fear of dealing with our feelings in an effort to "not be ruled by our emotions" to a new-think where we see the feeling for what it is...a tool. We get to decide how to use this tool to our benefit.
We have been raising our kids and ourselves in a swipe and click mentality where the swiping and new information is coming at us so rapidly, we are subconsciously being taught to react very quickly, which doesn't leave much time for whole thought. It is much more fun, and easier, to comment on someone's post to get laughs and "likes" than it is to stop and consider how another person might feel about our comment. This lack of compassion, I believe is a huge part of societal anxiety, and ultimately, the answer to the social anxiety puzzle. Compassion. Time for ourselves, recognition of our feelings and acknowledgement of what they mean so that we can come from a place of union with the image of WHO we want to BE and respond accordingly.
We haven't been teaching ourselves, or our young people how to deal with FEELINGS.
With the trending discussions of anxiety and my new book, "Unbound" coming out along with it's conference to further the discussion, anxiety is HOT TOPIC right now.
There are many things to discuss associated with this and I'll leave it until the book comes out for you to check into more on that. In the meantime,how do we help ourselves to be more responsive with compassion, rather than knee jerk reaction to feeling? Simply, it's to take the time to acknowledge the feeling in the moment and do NOTHING. Take the time to identify the feeling and then decide from the place of who you want to be how you will respond.
Here's a blip from the new book I think might explain it better:
"Feeling Anxiety
Because all anxieties are not the same, there is a large gaping hole in the understanding of what anxiety truly is and must be addressed in order to be an effective resolution according to feelings and actual physiology.
Anxiety is a Feeling
In truth, “anxiety” is actually a word describing a feeling. Over time, the constant feeling of anxiety turned the word into a diagnosis.
I mentioned the true use of the body to develop physiological affects as protective mechanisms and a tool for the individual to change what’s happening, like a dashboard warning light. Because of this, I believe anxiety can dramatically become an overuse, or even a misuse of the tool it was meant to be. Is it possible that an individual does not “have anxiety”, but rather has a learned imbalance to the response to feeling?
I believe one would help themselves better if they understood that they are currently “feeling anxious”. Even if only as a matter of principle. If the body believes everything we tell it, it would make sense then, wouldn’t it, to acknowledge and honor our bodies by acknowledging that we are currently feeling anxious but to not label ourselves as “having anxiety”. To do this, tells the body that if we are diseased, we must then always have anxiety. That we are out of power, out of control, and must continue to exhibit symptoms. There is a difference between recognizing a bodily need, and giving it permission to have control over our lives. Please understand, I believe heavily in the use of suggestive therapy, and this is my opinion based on experience, though one should consider the validity of this for themselves.
The feelings of anxiety are an incredible growth tool that will get you and keep you on your soul’s path, if you listen to it and be aware of it. It is easier to ignore something and try to “make it go away” but permanent benefit comes with awareness and taking it head on. The longer the ignored triggers of anxiety exist, the harder and more buried they become making it more difficult to see where you went astray."
Learning to identify, acknowledge and respond to feelings is the first step before we even consider methods to "manage" the anxiety we feel.
CBD oil is a popular trend right now if you google natural measures to manage anxiety and in that I will say three things:
One, I cannot believe that in all the discussion about anxiety how LITTLE is talked about where it's coming from and what to do about it.
Two, I believe wholeheartedly in the use of CBD, it's benefits, and it's regulatory functions. I believe in the positive uses and the many symptoms it can help with. I've used it, I've mentioned it repeatedly to others, and I don't question it.
However, number THREE, no matter the benefits of ANY measure we still need to address the real issues, and in the case of anxiety, many of which stem from our feelings and perceptions.
Let me know your thoughts.
Other articles you might like: