The Number One Reason People Don't Create Healthy Boundaries...Is This You?
Now is the time, more than ever, to really and truly create what and who you want to be! Look at all the things you really want to spend your time doing. What boundaries do you need to employ so that you don't betray yourself? Don't wake up one more morning wondering how you got here. You choose every single day what activities you are going to participate in. Yes, I know you can't just drop your responsibilities, but you CAN slowly and gradually start making choices that WILL move you in the direction you eventually want to be. AND there's something to be said about blooming where you are planted. It teaches gratitude. And it IS where you are until you build into what's next.
Today, let's talk about one of the limiting reasons I hear frequently. If we discuss it openly and honestly with ourselves, you will find hidden concepts (belief systems and thoughts) that upon awareness, you might decide are very limiting and need to re-thought. These types of examinations allow one to do that.
Ask yourself why you don’t do something that you know is within you to do. It is something you want, and you stop yourself. What is stopping you, I wonder? And even perhaps more importantly, why?
One of the things I hear repeated more than once is the excuse of “But it’s selfish!”. I commend you on your efforts to want to put other people first, but this is exactly how negative energy is created. It’s the basic subtraction principles we learned in elementary school. If you have nothing to give, how can you subtract? If you do subtract anyway, it moves into the negative section of the number line.
For example: you say “Whatever is easier for you” When you know darn well that taking the 5pm appointment is going to make you stressed to try get there in time, is going to put your family’s evening routine on hectic, and make your boss upset that you have to leave work early. Even if your intention was to make it easier on the other person, do you see the levels of negative energy that have been created? The new karmas that have to be balanced? You are keeping the balance scale or pendulum swinging from one extreme to the next this way and how can you possibly feel balanced doing this? The best thing you can do for yourself, your family, everyone involved, and the universe that relies on balance as a whole, is to be honest to yourself and operate in truth for what’s true for you.
Next I would examine why you feel obligated to make it easier on the other person. This can pull out many concepts that need to be examined.
You can see how not doing something because you perceive it to be judged “selfish” really is selfish by NOT doing it because you are not honoring yourself and your inner spirit. Plus, you don’t know how you could be influencing the universe and the people in it. You are continuing to keep the scales of balance imbalanced.
Here are 14 Questions You Can Ask to help you create good, safe, healthy boundaries.
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